Bulletin Board
Rants, Raves, Interesting Science & Awful Puns
August 16, 1998

Impossible Rhymes

Who says?

I got a note from somebody claiming that no word in the English language rhymes with "month," "orange," "silver," or "purple." Well, a challenge is not something to be passed over lightly by an Irishman, and for somebody of my profession, certainly not one with a literary connotation. So, after retreating pen-in-teeth into a period of some solitary meditation on the matter, I emerge to present the following modest offerings:

The animalth rathed three timeth latht month,
The hare won twithe and the tortoithe oneth.

An Irishman Green,
Can take the potheen.
But an Irishman Orange
Ends up on the flooranj'
Ust doesn't seem able,
To stay at the table

When you're choking,
Turning purple,
A hearty slap and one good burp'll
Usually fix it.

Gold and silver
presents willvir
Ginity tend to
Put an end to.

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